“you are the average of the 5 people you associate with most”
Tim Ferriss, author of many books including the Four Hour Work Week, often reminds himself of this and his millions of podcast listeners.
The first time I heard him suggest this was a revelation to me. I hadn’t up to that point considered the enormous affect people close to me really had.
Now I think of this idea in seperate areas of my life; work, friends and even family.
- How do I feel when I am with these people?
- Do I love or dread to be with them?
- Am I lifted by their presence?
If I feel my own energy is down, I review the company I am keeping and what their energy has been. Tim is right (for me anyway) I am the average of the people I associate with.
Personally I want to hang with people who lift me, who inspire me, who I can learn from, who I can grow with.
Be careful though, sometimes you might be the one in the group who is bringing the average down. Check in with yourself on occasion and ask if you are contributing or taking.
If you find yourself hanging with people that take your energy more than they give, it might be time to move on.
This reminds me of my Step-Brother who is no longer with us in the land of the living. We both loved golf, but didn’t have the lifestyle, nor the income to play as regularly as we would have loved to do. For those precious moments when we did have time, he would always make sure we played with someone far better than both of us. After his guest would beat the both of us time and time again, I asked him one day, why he kept asking people who were far superior to join us in a game we both loved. ‘We play better when we play with someone better than us.’ In honor of my good mate and step-brother Paul, let me say that again in a different way. Working, playing, striving with people who are better than us makes us work harder, play harder and driver harder than most of us. Unless you’re in the league of LeBron James and striving to be the best LeBron James you can be, most of us mere mortals want to strive to be in a place where you’re a small fish in a big pond, not the biggest fish in the smallest pond.
Great story Glen. Thank you for sharing.
Paul was a wise soul indeed.